How Toxic of a D&D Player Am I?

I encourage you to watch Blaine Simple's full video to get more detailed descriptions of each flag.

Not gonna lie, ever since I helped Alevius work on a Genshin Impact MBTI spreadsheet, I got a restored drive to write blog posts again. Despite my much busier schedule now (3-hour Japanese classes three times a week, a 1-hour Christian group meeting once a week, and the usual 3 Genshin Impact accounts I'm playing), I'm aiming to bring back a consistent weekly blog schedule; I consider it a personal training ground for when I finally move into my new house and resume my YouTube schedule.

During the late stage of my admittedly super-long hiatus, I developed a moderate amount of interest in Baldur's Gate 3: a video game based on Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition that took the world by storm. As a beginner Dungeon Master who reads D&D rules for personal entertainment (because I barely have anyone to play with), I thought to myself, "So this is what a D&D game looks like when made more realistic! Theater of the mind can be such a pain. I can use this as inspiration for my own D&D games."

So I am once again regularly doing D&D-related stuff, even if it's just for myself like this blog post.

Red headings refer to red flags (bad traits). Green headings refer to green flags (good traits). A strikethrough means a certain flag does not apply to me. Italicization means I give myself partial points; see the detailed description for exactly how many points. The lower the overall score, the better.

Red Flags

Tardy (+1)

I have been unfortunately guilty of something worse than this earlier this 2023: being absent. I was so busy grinding Genshin Impact and lost interest in D&D that I completely forgot when my players proposed a schedule. Although they didn't remind me, I put the blame all on myself as their DM.

No Alarm (+1)

See above.

Interrupter (+1)

As far as I know, I almost never interrupt anyone else who's talking while playing. I let every player give their ideas or perform their roleplay and I let the DM finish narrating before I make my moves.

I am guilty of many times of doing this, however, in my family and my classes as an English teacher so I give myself a 0.5.

Unfair Fights (+1)

Almost never. I had to learn it the hard way, though, when I thought my younger brother's Lv. 1 paladin and YoSquid's Lv. 1 fighter could beat a CR 2 ochre jelly (WHYYY, Wizards of the Coast, did you script the encounter to be this hard!?)...but I failed to explain that the ochre jelly is immune to slashing damage after my brother slashed it multiple times with a longsword and it constantly split into smaller, lower-HP copies that still dealt the same amount of damage per hit. I could've allowed him to deal piercing damage instead 'cause my brother is a fan of Roman history; I imagine him using the spatha which can both pierce and slash.

The next time I ran Dragon of Icespire Peak, I followed a guide made by Sly Flourish and, instead of having a manticore initially try to break into an herbalist's house, I instead made my own stat block of basic, low-level Trorks (a common monster in Hytale) and made only two of them try to break in. Despite the height disadvantage my players had, the numbers advantage prevailed as the team finished off the last Trork with a fatality.

My players, a few months later, told me they wanted to start with a fresh new campaign so I chose Lost Mine of Phandelver this time around. It normally starts with a four-goblin encounter...but I didn't like how high their AC of 15 was so I toned down the number of goblins to 3 to weaken their action economy; I don't want anyone dying on the first fight. At first, there were only three of us: LT, Telnior (a sorcerer), and YoSquid fighting the goblins but Glacie later finished his character sheet and joined in with his newly-created ranger, thus turning the encounter into a Curb-Stomp Battle. Given how cowardly the goblins were and how YoSquid made TCG-related jokes, I did some improv and made one of the goblins a TCG addict who surrendered upon getting low on HP and became the party's hostage.

I once made an encounter with hostile dwarf-like manifestations that were permanently affected by Electro so Telnior could inflict Superconduct with his frostbite spell...but we never got to finish it due to sudden IRL interruptions.

Module Reader (+2)

N/A. When my brother and YoSquid DMed for me, their stories were completely made up on the spot. I'm honestly impressed 'cause they had never read ANY D&D campaigns before yet the stories were coherent.

Not like I'd ever do this without warning the DM, of course.

Secret Stealer (+2)

I'm the resident D&D rule junkie so, except for Alevius who made her own and willingly shared it with me, I helped my fellow players create all their character sheets, whether or not I was the DM for the next session. Also, I never look at my DM's notes or even his/her dice rolls.

But at least this red flag informed me that if I ever run into other players who are indeed familiar with making character sheets, I should ask permission before taking a peek. From a roleplay perspective, knowing everything about the other characters as written on their character sheets at the very start of the campaign does not make sense—it's like how one cannot magically know a random stranger.

Rage After Death (+1)

Nope. Oddly, I didn't feel much emotion when my DMPC died to a flock of stirges; I just felt concerned that my party would get rekt and slightly irritated that YoSquid chose to just leave his body behind. I'm so glad, though, that Telnior had the idea of appealing to his god, Kelpeos the god of time, to reverse the flow of time on LT and revive him.

Even if the two did leave LT's body in the wilderness, I can always tailor most encounters around them...except maybe for one that will punish them for letting the rogue tactician die a dishonorable death. Maybe a bunch of melee-attacking bandits that would kidnap them once they're low on HP 'cause the two focus on ranged attacks?

Murder Hobo (+1)

Never. Thank goodness. I've learned early on to try to value NPCs; it's like liking an anime character while being fully aware he/she isn't real. (Case in point: me having Sucrose as my waifu.) None of my players are murder hobos either.

That said, I'd be excited to play a campaign that encourages us to basically be GTA mass murderers...

Character Clones (+1)

Yes, I'm guilty of this. "Lunaran Tealeaf" is a high elf wizard who is a more low-key and academic version of myself.

ERP Out of Place (+3)

Never. None of my campaigns have had even a tiny bit of romance.

OK, I have allowed this recently. In the Wyvern Tor cave (which I turned into an artificer's factory but I kept the orcs and ogre), YoSquid suggested to Glacia to dress up as a female orc and get on the orcs' good side. We had a set of hide armor from a dead orc so we made Glacia wear that. She acted real innocent yet curious...though thankfully, she didn't do anything overly sexual and neither did I. She distracted the bosses enough to the point that the orc boss slapped two of his minions' butts and made them run away in fear while the ogre cracked a flammable potion in its waist while sitting down which Gnome Alevius, our artificer, ignited with a crossbow bolt.

When we came back to Phandalin, I ran the Redbrand Ruffians encounter. We killed three ruffians and KO'd the last one. Later, LT carried an injured Gnome Alevius to the inn while YoSquid and Glacia interrogated the ruffian. As part of the interrogation, YoSquid looted literally everything the ruffian possessed...even his underwear. When they also went into the inn, I made a random patron make a Stealth check which failed so YoSquid caught him taking pictures of the naked ruffian. (Yes, I allow modern-day stuff like this as a joke.) The squid jokingly charged the pervert 69,420 gp...but of course, commoners don't have that kind of money.

Synergy (+1)

I don't think so. While I admit I want to encourage my players to make a balanced party, I try to convince myself that roleplay takes priority so my players can make whatever characters they want. While YoSquid being a fighter isn't ideal for me since I got lucky on rolling for LT's stats and put the good numbers on Strength, Dexterity, and Constitution, I still let him play a fighter because maybe YoSquid just likes the armor and weapon versatility that comes with the class.

CR Clone (+2)

Nope. I'm too lazy to even watch Critical Role.

Snack Junkie (+2)

I'm guilty in that I've never brought any food...but to be fair, none of the other players brought food either. We just didn't think this through when we first started D&D so I give myself a 1.

At someone else's home, I always ask permission before eating something that isn't mine.

Don't Touch (+1)

We can't even buy any miniatures so instead, since we only have one dice set from the Essentials Kit, we let each other borrow dice occasionally. Also, I prefer the sounds of clickity-clackities over simply tapping on a digital random number generator.

Abilities or Bust (+2)

I admit that sometimes, my imagination fails and goes to the standard "I attack with my longsword" but I try as much as possible to add flavor to my ability uses. For example, after being supercharged by water, LT rolled high on an Acrobatics check, swung around trees like a monkey, and before a heated argument with Telnior and YoSquid against two goblins got uglier, LT swooped down Assassin's Creed-style and I used the Cleaving Through Creatures rule plus a lucky critical hit to insta-kill both of the goblins.

DM Blame (+2)

I don't remember doing this...and I think I wouldn't ever do this (except jokingly) so I'll give myself no points.

Awooga (+2)

I haven't even run into NPCs remotely similar to Sangonomiya Kokomi or Sucrose.

Left to Fester (+3)

The extreme opposite: I have blown up at Aby and YoSquid for being absent from D&D three times in a row so I'll still give myself 3 points.

Do I have any current major problems with my group, including Glacie, though? Aside from not having any D&D games in a while, probably not. I know we're all busy as heck with all sorts of life commitments.

Fish on Land (+2)

I'm already pretty aware that my brother is a fan of Roman history and The Elder Scrolls lore so I don't see how my self-insert rogue or Lunaran Tealeaf would be out of place as solo adventurers. He also let me use those characters anyway without any problems; otherwise, given how blunt he is, I think he would've pointed them out.

Shopping Sickness (+1)

Not "too long" by any of our standards...but YoSquid shouted so loud at the herbalist's ear in Dragon of Icespire Peak that she was temporarily deafened. I would've just bought a potion of healing and called it a day. Maybe YoSquid got carried away with his silly antics.

Long Breaks (+2)

Hasn't happened yet. We always played our games from start to finish.

PVP (+2)

Only with permission. When we do this, it's completely separate from the main campaign so even if a character "dies" in PVP, they go back to their original states in the campaign. This is just for fun.

DMPC (+3)

I'm obviously guilty of this in case you haven't seen it already. However, here are my defense points:

I asked my players beforehand if they wanted LT to join the campaign and they agreed. They were new players, after all, so they may need a level-headed companion to show them the ropes.

Fighters and sorcerers don't start with a whole lot of skills so LT can balance things out as a skill monkey.

LT focuses on melee combat while the other two are ranged attackers. More balance, bro.

I try to give each player besides LT their chance to shine such as Telnior revealing the identity of a mimic and YoSquid helping to force the TCG-addicted goblin to surrender.

On the opposite end, even if he somehow has a ranged weapon, I make LT recklessly charge toward enemies on purpose to increase his chance of dying. Why? Because he likes the sensation of smacking things hard.

I'll give myself 3 points anyway out of fairness. Let me know if you think I should give myself fewer points, though.

Immersion Breaker (+2)

I only break immersion if I have to talk about something important such as having to go to my next English class. Other than that, we're usually hyper-focused on the campaign.

Level 1 Forever (+1)

Heck no! As a video game RPG addict, I LOVE the idea of gaining XP. It's habitual at this point for me to type all sorts of OG Pokémon game-inspired messages like:

ALEVIUS used DUST DEVIL!

The wild HILICHURL FIGHTER swirled! PYRO spread onto the opposing HILICHURL SHOOTER!

That's it! I knew you could do it!

You defeated 2 enemies at the same time!

ALEVIUS gained 100 EXP. Points!

Using Discord for our D&D makes tracking EXP even easier since I can simply search the message history for "exp points".

Fight Fight Fight! (+1)

Because of how short and text-restricted our sessions are, this inevitably happens.

But we balance it out with pure roleplay-only sessions so I won't give myself any points.

Yeeeaaahhh...I've run three combat-heavy sessions in a row: one against a lone orc, one against the bosses in the Wyvern Tor cave, and one in Phandalin with the Redbrand Ruffians.

I know I over-rationalize my behavior but for the lone orc, I let Telnior be diplomatic before the fight. For the Wyvern Tor bosses, see ERP Out of Place; I also added more to Gnome Alevius's and LT's lore. For the Redbrand Ruffians, I deliberately made LT fight recklessly to emphasize his Destruction Path and the dice rolls naturally punished him by having one ruffian get high rolls on an opportunity attack and a Perception check to find him while he was hiding. Gnome Alevius had to use her newly learned Cure Wounds spell on him and, while in a hurry, she also got hit by an opportunity attack.

No Foresight (+3)

I'll give myself 1 point for this one; see "Tardy" above.

I'd give all 3 points to some of my annoying students, though. Every lesson involving a news article has an audio narration clip to help the student pronounce the many unfamiliar words...and they act as if these audio files don't exist. That or they overuse Introverted Sensing (Si) and Introverted Thinking (Ti) and stick way too heavily to what they think is correct regardless of evidence to the contrary—screw ISFJs' trickster Extroverted Thinking (Te).

___ Into D&D (+2)

Very much guilty; I made my own Genshin Impact elemental reaction ruleset.

Copyright (+1)

Don't care! I do not record/stream my full, unedited D&D sessions on Twitch or YouTube. You've seen me using Trorks and elemental reactions.

We're not Friends Anymore (+3)

YoSquid is a menace in whatever D&D campaign he shows up in...but I never take it personally. Instead, I just laugh like a bro whenever he wants to rob yet another merchant caravan.

In my English classes, I wish I could grant inspiration to a select few students because of their amazing roleplay—it's quite rare to see such creative minds. But I'm a teacher, not a Dungeon Master in that situation.

OFFICIAL OR BUST (+3)

Nope! I roll with whatever custom rules my DM wants as long as I don't think they're unfair.

Item Hoarder (+2)

A.K.A. the Treasure Hoarder.

I generally have a mentality of "whatever items anyone in my party acquires belong to the whole party" with exceptions like, say, weapons we specialize in like YoSquid specializing in longbows and items we have emotional attachments to like family heirlooms. I take everyone's budgets into consideration or just use LT's own money when buying items.

All Eyes on You (+2)

I don't think so. See DMPC.

Mario into D&D (+2)

Trorks are there, yadda yadda.

I also had a plan to add Oscar Garvin, the composer of Hytale and a D&D fan, into my campaign as a minor NPC but I scrapped it.

I NEED HEALING (+2)

Nope! Never did this once even though Telnior knows cure wounds.

Dark Past (+3)

Don't be surprised that LT has this. In D&D, it's basically a more medieval fantasy version of running away from a communist country; in this case, LT was a former farmer with his family who ran away by himself when the government took over control of the supply of crops and had to steal to survive.

Lunaran Tealeaf, however, has no such backstory.

I'll give myself 2 points.

Was That In-character? (+1)

See for yourself.

Your Fun is Wrong (+2)

I've never played older D&D versions...and to be honest, I have no interest in learning a new one for now. I'd politely decline if I were invited to such a game.

One D&D looks pretty cool to me, though, and I'm excited to try it.

My Boss is OP! (+1)

I haven't even made up any BBEG stat blocks. Even if I did, though, such as for my original story's main antagonist Supreme Leader Lekimao (a communist leader), I wouldn't brag about how strong he is; I'd leave it up to the party to naturally discover how strong he is such as by having escapees of the country of Lekimao narrate their opinions on their leader.

While I continue to practice, I'll just use the young white dragon in Dragon of Icespire Peak as a beginner-level BBEG.

Bad Day Bad Game (+2)

Unlikely even if I immediately start D&D after having a lesson with a demanding jerk student or Mom rages at my incompetence. I'll eventually and quickly get over it as we play and my frown gets turned upside-down.

Funny enough, even when I'm still incredibly groggy, I can somehow run great games. Not to brag but Alevius is impressed by my improv skills—this is coming from a girl who regularly plays D&D with some of the most creative and unhinged members of her family.

No RP (+3)

You've gotta be kidding me. Of course, I roleplay! The chaos that my party sometimes gets into can make my day!

Wild Everything (+2)

I feel personally called out, not gonna lie.

Darn it, I just like Pokémon! Guess what Telnior and YoSquid's first-ever fight in their D&D experience was? A wild encounter with two wolves jumping out from bushes.

Phone User (+2)

Nope. Again, we're hyper-focused.

No Children Allowed (+3)

None of my players so far have brought any child characters though, hypothetically, I would allow my niece to play as herself just because I think seeing her roleplay would be extremely cute.

Incorrect Gender (+3)

I was mildly surprised when Glacie's ranger was female despite him being male but I rolled with it anyway 'cause I know Glacie likes his waifus and this ranger can mix things up from the usual bro squad.

Game Breaker (+3)

I don't even know how to do this despite watching DnD Shorts. I just want to see him explaining big damage numbers, not actually try to do them in my games since I don't metagame in D&D.

Class Clown (+2)

Never. I stick as much as possible to having LT be a level-headed tactician...except when melee-attacking his foes.

Constantly Confused (+2)

I can't quite explain it but I'm good at distinguishing this mostly because I have experience making my own homebrew and seeing others'.

Validate Me (+3)

Again, I usually don't try to argue with the DM.

Blood Flags (+100 each, +700 total)

I won't talk about these much because, to paraphrase a comment by @BlobOfAwe, most of these are just crimes that wouldn't be allowed in any situation, not just D&D.

I have physically attacked my brother multiple times outside of D&D. The last time was when he raged at Mom so loud early in the morning; I REALLY can't stand hearing harsh words from anyone...except myself.

There are also times when I feel like punching my students in the face such as when they report me even though I never did anything wrong and they were clearly in the wrong such as by literally never talking.

I admit I get curious and search through my parents' things. I've never peeked at YoSquid's backpack, though. I'd never steal anything regardless.

I don't enjoy shipping in D&D in the first place, I'd never kill off someone's character as revenge, and I know my players aren't interested in politics so I don't discuss them—we have topics that are so much more fun.

"Racism" and "discrimination", however, have such loose definitions these days thanks to the left so I'm not even going to count that.

All in all, I give myself 200 points.

Green Flags

Always Improving (-3)

That's why I'm making this blog post, isn't it? I want to be more aware of my flaws as a DM mostly because I still consider myself a noob at this.

Been the DM (-1)

Yes, obviously.

Regular DM (-3)

Yep—I'm a forever DM 'cause I actually have FUN reading the many rules of this game.

Open to Feedback (-3)

I always ask my players at the end of every session, "So, how was the game?"

I get all positive feedback though I'm a bit worried about not having a single bit of negative feedback, not gonna lie. Alevius has given me a point for improvement: I should tie the events more closely to LT's story so he feels less like a bland character. As such, in the next game, I made the perfume loot in the Wyvern Tor cave connected to his dead mother so, in a fit of raging regret for not protecting his parents, he punched random things in the artificer factory. I also teased that this has something to do with the BBEG.

Snacks are on You (-2)

See Snack Junkie. No point reductions for me.

Tidying Up (-1)

We use the empty "halves" of the Essentials Kit box to roll dice. Hehe.

At least I did this one. We have a spacious place upstairs for multiple purposes: archery, melee combat training, relaxing, aimlessly walking around while playing video games, and of course, D&D. I always get the table or yoga mat ready with all the necessary equipment: the DM screen, dice, character sheets, scratch paper, pencils, erasers, and a whole lot of other things that I may have forgotten about at this point.

Info Sheets (-2)

I never thought about giving this one regarding Dragon of Icespire Peak; all I did was hand them the Sword Coast map included in the Essentials Kit.

I did, however, write and explain whatever homebrew rules I had such as the Genshin Impact elemental reactions.

Players Matter (-2)

To the point that I tailor certain in-game events based on their interests. For example, I know how trendy Among Us is so I made the gnomes in Gnomengarde have something akin to an emergency meeting where they try to find a mimic disguised as one of the gnomes. I also allow Telnior and YoSquid to engage in whatever ridiculous things they want to do.

Though I may have taken it too far with letting Glacia dress like an attractive orc and YoSquid loot a ruffian's underwear. See ERP Out of Place.

Impactful Death (-1)

I didn't make LT's death impactful on purpose to give Telnior and YoSquid the freedom to decide what to do with his body.

So far, though, Telnior and YoSquid are still alive.

Gift (-1)

Errr, I've given YoSquid some Minecraft swords made with crayons and cereal boxes, I guess? Screw it, I won't count it.

Early Warning (-2)

Did I do this before? I can't remember. I won't reduce my score.

Additional Green Flags Courtesy of @socialistrepublicofvietnam1500

You read the rules (-1)

Yep; see Regular DM.

You know your character (-1)

Of course. Sneak-attacking comes naturally to me both in-game and in real life.

You try to follow any plothooks the DM gives you (-1)

I've tried to go off-story a few times such as having Lunaran Tealeaf insist on helping out in a war that my brother's kingdom was fighting in. I even used Extroverted Intuition (Ne) to explain how he would help out such as using minor illusion to distract the enemy army a bit but after several "no" responses, I respectfully gave up and moved on with the quest designated by my brother.

I give myself a 0.5.

You are adaptive to your player's triggers and stuff (-2)

Thankfully, they don't get triggered by a lot of things, if any. Otherwise, they wouldn't be my friends in the first place.

Though to be honest, I don't know what triggers my players.

Alevius, thankfully, didn't mind the "sexy orc" and the stolen ruffian undies. See ERP Out of Place.

You bring snacks for other people too (-2)

See Snack Junkie.

You actively try to not make a mess for whoever is hosting (-1)

When I visit YoSquid's house, I try to limit how much I move because I otherwise struggle to stay still.

When playing D&D regardless of who's hosting, I try to ensure that everything around my space is logically organized and spacious enough for the rest of the players. I do not impose these rules on my players, though.

You actively try to make the game more fun for other players (-2)

Due to the redundancy of this with Players Matter, I will not give myself any point reductions.

Connecting and actively RPing with other PCs (-1)

I admit I have a bit of a negative bias toward YoSquid so I don't have LT interact with him much aside from stopping him from doing his crackheaded stunts. I should do better—since Baldur's Gate 3 has a lot of class-exclusive dialogue options, I could take inspiration and use LT's rogue expertise to assist YoSquid in causing mischief that actually benefits the party.

In Gnomengarde during the Among Us-inspired emergency meeting, I let Telnior do most of the talking to smoke out the mimic disguised as a gnome while LT snuck away and stood by to prepare for a sneak attack. He tempted the mimic by talking about the taste of food, eventually causing the mimic to lose control over its disguise and reveal its true form. As soon as that happened, LT pounced and stabbed one of the mimic's eyes with his dagger, inflicting 12 damage (3 + 3 STR mod + 6 Sneak Attack damage).

I give myself a 0.5.

Helping the DM with things such as setting up (-2)

Easy. I'm obsessed with organization.

I don't mind carrying that D&D Essentials Kit box around even though I stuffed it with lots of paper and pencils, even the coloring kinds. I like flexing my physical strength.

I'm also usually the only one in my group with D&D-specialized equipment and digital tools. Heck, I always carry dice in my sling bag in case I want to roll for things other than D&D such as randomly deciding what to eat in a restaurant or pretending to play Genius Invokation TCG.

My brother has his world written down on World Anvil but that's pretty much it.

Alevius is quite prepared for our games as well considering she's a D&D veteran. She knows the effects of her features well and corrects me without being an obnoxious rules lawyer when I miss important details. (Would you believe it if I told you she hasn't played Baldur's Gate 3?)

Glacia, on the other hand, is learning how to use D&D Beyond which is awesome.

Adding Up My Points

When not counting any blood flags, my total number of points is 2.5, making me a goblin. I was this close to being a pixie but ERP Out of Place really hurt my score. To be honest, I wasn't a fan of YoSquid looting the ruffian's underwear but oh well, it's not the worst thing in the world.