I Don't Like Competitive Multiplayer

Disclaimer: I’m not saying that competitive multiplayer in general is bad. E-sports can promote camaraderie and strategy-building just like physical sports. Competitive multiplayer is just not for my taste. If you like competitive multiplayer, then, by all means, rek dem n00bs.

“Real gamers”, I think, are often stereotyped as players who regularly play the mainstream competitive video games, usually MOBAs like League of Legends or shooters like Fortnite or VALORANT. (This post mainly focuses on these two categories of multiplayer games.)

I’ve been gaming since 2003 when I was 4 years old, but the vast majority of my gaming years were spent on single-player.
In the mid-2000s, we had no Internet connection. In the late 2000s, the only competitive multiplayer game we had at home was the Warcraft III map Defense of the Ancients (DoTA), but it was too complicated for my tween self to learn. I spent part of the mid- and late 2010s on competitive Minecraft PvP but I simply was unable to aim as accurately and click as fast as the majority of the competition.
Regardless, I still think of myself as a real gamer. If I wasn’t, do you think I’d be able to write edgy tactical blog posts about my favorite games, one of which hasn’t been released yet? lololol
Enough background because I suck at introductions.

The Learning Curve, Man!

Competitive multiplayer, from my experience, is simply not beginner-friendly. Many competitive games don’t have single-player modes, or if they do, they don’t have AI-controlled enemies with the same abilities as human players.

In single-player fights, the player is often introduced to new enemies slowly, often starting with weak enemies with simple and predictable attacks before moving to powerful enemies with lots of complicated tactics. This ensures newer players don’t suffer from information overload.

In competitive multiplayer games, players are often given a wide variety of options for how they want to fight. Do they want to play as a hyper-offensive hero or one that is designed to control the battlefield and troll enemies? Do they want the assault rifle or the sniper rifle? Then they can have ‘em.
This causes information overload, even if a player wants to focus only on a single play style. They have to learn at least a little about every gun or hero. Failing to do so means they’ll likely get curb-stomped the whole session (possibly multiple sessions), and losing over and over again in video games is not worth it compared to losing a lot in real life.
Also, single-player enemies are designed to be beaten by players of varying skill levels. In competitive multiplayer, expect all your enemies—even the noobs—to kill you as mercilessly as possible.
Especially beware of veteran players who make second accounts to pose as new players while curb-stomping actual noobs (i.e. smurfing).

Playing With People You Don’t Know

eggwick, a VALORANT YouTuber, said briefly that he doesn't feel attached to random teammates. I feel the same, but I wanna spice it up 'cause I'm a lunatic.

Playing with friends is arguably the most ideal way to play any team-based multiplayer game (especially VALORANT). You have the advantage of being able to communicate with your friends properly; you trust them to carry the team and they trust you to do the same. There’s that sense of give-and-take, such as one player making a complex plan and two friends carrying it out effectively. The feeling of “we won” is different from “I won”. The feeling of “you saved my life” is different from “you stole my kill”.

But, as most people know, life’s a jerk. Work here, school there, family here, another friend there, maybe this bank, this utility provider, or this government agency… This can prevent even best friends from getting together for a game. (I wonder how often this happens to professional e-sports teams that play for a living and don’t take up higher education. My dad’s brain got rekt when he took up his master’s education.)

Therefore, players will often choose to play with random teammates. In my mind, players of the same rank, whether low or high, can have drastically different skill levels; I played Minecraft multiplayer on the same server from 2015 to 2019 and I still had a hard time competing. With friends, you know your friends’ strengths and weaknesses. With random teammates, you have no prior idea about any of those. The fast-paced gameplay of many competitive multiplayer games, as well as potential language barriers and a lack of microphones, prevent players from communicating properly with one another, basically forcing players to rely on themselves.
(Ironically, this kind of defeats the purpose of VALORANT’s team-focused gameplay. For example, barriers and sight blockers affect both allies and enemies, so you may end up harming allies in the process of helping yourself and harming your enemies.)

Thankfully, I don't plan to make a living on competitive multiplayer, so I don't need to learn the common languages used by gamers other than English.

A lack of microphones is not a big deal for friends because they can make a game plan in advance.

What About Among Us?

Among Us is a rather unique multiplayer game. There is at least one impostor among the crewmates of a spaceship. The goal of the crewmates is to either finish all their work or kick out all the impostors.

Admittedly, I mainly picked up the game because Aby and YoSquid also got into it and I wanted to play a game we could quickly pick up, especially since Among Us is a mobile title. (Oh, look. A means to an end.)
My secondary reason was to see if I’d like the game even if I play it by myself, so I played a bunch of test games.

I can’t properly explain why I don’t enjoy Among Us despite me liking Game of the Generals, a chess-like board game where units beat each other based on ranks that are unknown to opposing players (for example, only I know I used a 5-star general to eliminate the enemy, while only the opponent knows their 4-star general was eliminated, so I could assume I eliminated a private and the other player could assume I used a spy), as well as Yandere Simulator, a game about pretending to be a normal schoolgirl while eliminating rivals.
Maybe I don’t feel like training my muscle memory to get used to the many crewmate tasks so I could finish them quickly. Maybe I don’t feel like learning the strategy behind staying safe as a crewmate or the psychology of impostors.
(I wonder what kind of grade I’d get if Among Us game theory becomes part of a psychology course. I’d range it from A- to C+.)

In my first few Among Us games with Aby and YoSquid, I openly revealed my identity as either a crewmate or an impostor, which I think is a bad practice. It ruins the suspense. I was new to the game, so I felt crazy and impulsive.

I should learn from how the Genshin Impact voice actors play Among Us. Being voice actors, they are hecka skilled at hiding their identities.

Anyway, you’re free to call me “sus” as a joke. I’d be flattered.

After all, when I meet someone new, I ask a boatload of questions like Albedo from Genshin Impact did to the Traveler...and Albedo has a reputation of being sus, especially after what we learned in Chapter I Act IV: We Will Be Reunited.

The Multiplayer I Like Playing Nowadays

Yes, I still like some kinds of multiplayer. These ones are far less frustrating.

You probably know what I’ll say first thanks to my addiction to Genshin Impact: co-op. For me, co-op carries the same level of camaraderie as competitive team-based multiplayer minus the learning curve. In Genshin Impact, in particular, it’s fun when I play with a team that curb-stomps every enemy in a fight that I’d struggle with if I did it myself. It's somewhat common for co-op hosts to thank their teammates after spending all their Resin (energy/stamina) in consecutive domain runs, which is honestly very wholesome.

I would play Hytale in co-op Adventure Mode, though right now, I don't have any official teammates; I only like to team up with close friends. Thank goodness I’ve mentally prepared myself to be a One-Man Army since I first saw the Hytale trailer.

The other type of multiplayer I like is friendly matches where friends fight each other, often using custom rules, in an otherwise competitive multiplayer game. These matches don’t punish players for winning or losing, and players can willingly hold back to help their friends get better…or maybe flex at them for kicking their butts with a bad strategy. These fights are just as much fun for me as doing Hypothetical Fight Debates.

Competitive Multiplayer Games I Actually Like

Pokémon Showdown is one of my favorite competitive games, even though I haven’t played it in months. No need to spend weeks breeding and training the perfect team; just type in the stats and moves you want and you’re all set. Pokémon battles are about pure strategy, so no need to train for weeks or months that would otherwise be spent on honing muscle memory for an action multiplayer game. Plus, thanks to Smogon’s unique battle rules, you can comfortably use a team of weak Pokémon you like or are good at without being forced to face powerful top-tier Pokémon.
Even if, say, you don’t know how competition-relevant mechanics like EVs and IVs work, Pokémon Showdown simplifies them by giving suggested EV and IV spreads depending on your Pokémon’s moveset. Suggested moves are even prioritized!

Yes, I still play Fire Emblem Heroes. Even if you lose or get a few points in the competitive game modes, you still get rewarded for at least trying to play. Plus, all enemies are AI-controlled, even if they were fully custom-built by players. I love exploiting Artificial Stupidity.

Edit, June 15, 2021: I'm thinking of quitting, if not spending little time on, FEH because of the huge power creep since Book V. I keep getting matched with low spenders or whales in the competitive game modes. I don't want to reach their power level because my main focus is paying for and making a living out of Hytale; plus, I need to pay for my own physiological needs, y'know?

Edit: I quit after getting Brave Eirika. I was satisfied with the Heroes I had, I was too busy with Genshin Impact, and I can't stand having to do a huge checklist that partially involves increasingly and insanely difficult combat.

TL;DR summary: I don’t like competitive multiplayer games because the many gameplay mechanics players have to memorize from the start, as well as the difficulty of communicating with randomly matched teammates, make these games difficult for beginners to enjoy.